When People Let You Down
One of the most frustrating things about running your own business is when other people let you down.
People can disappoint you in countless ways: they may physically not show up, do a job incorrectly or below your standards, or emotionally project their own issues onto you—often in the form of accusations.
It’s disappointing, to say the least, and undeniably hurtful. It can feel like a punch to the gut, a knife in the back, or a blow to your ego. Ouch! One thing we have to accept is that others don’t value our business the way we do, so we can’t rely on them to. What we can do, however, is prioritise boundaries and put measures (like contracts) in place to buffer against setbacks. Sometimes these setbacks are intentional, sometimes accidental, but they’re all part of the journey.
I’ve personally experienced all of the above. I gave the benefit of the doubt to the wrong people, fell for too much flattery, and trusted that others’ intentions were positive—only to be hurt by false accusations that made me question myself, my purpose, and my goals. With help from some fabulous people who had “been there, done that” before me, I realised that growth comes from how we prepare for, respond to, and learn from these situations. These challenges won’t stop, unfortunately, but if we learn to handle them well, we grow as individuals and break barriers in business.
Boundaries
If you’re a creative in business, you may believe most people are also creative, free spirits who want to elevate the world’s vibration. Sadly, this isn’t always true. We must accept that we can’t change people, but we can protect ourselves and our work with boundaries. When we respect ourselves with clear boundaries, our whole world changes for the better.
Contracts
Contracts are boundaries in legal form, essential for your business. Attach contracts to every sale, idea, and product, and you will give yourself and your business the protection it deserves against fraud, betrayal, and deceit. If you can’t afford solicitor fees, consider using services like Law Depot as a starting point.
Emotional Alchemy
Emotional alchemy is a powerful concept rooted in the idea that we have the ability to transform negative experiences into valuable life lessons. This process includes:
Acceptance
Reflection
Reframing
Action
I discuss this further in my previous post, “Bad Teachers: Brief and Brutal.”
Discernment
Discernment is the ability to see through what is obscure. With discernment, you will recognise that it’s often not about you; it’s a reflection of those around you. In a discerning state, you don’t take things personally but instead observe those around you and make clearer decisions. Discernment is a powerful skill to master for both your well-being and your business. It intensifies your capabilities and boosts your confidence, so that when someone inevitably lets you down, the impact is less damaging and simply flows off you like water off a duck’s back.
Resources
For a deeper dive into emotional alchemy, I recommend Emotional Alchemy by Tara Bennett-Goleman
Stephanie Mitchell
Boutique Business